There are a lot of times in life we feel a little just not ready. When I was having natural birth with my second child because the doctor with the magic shot was at McDonalds I decided - I'm not ready. And, that's what I told my sister. Let's just go. This is crazy. But when it's time for the birth after 9 months the body kinda takes over and the baby says, Ready or Not - here I come.
My nineteen year old cat, Moses was like that this morning. At 4:00am.
He has established his own eating pattern that makes no sense but his. To torture me. He can wail and meow and cry like a banshee. Wail like he is going. to. die. if he doesn't eat immediately. I get up. Feed the cat. Think - it's the Advent of a new day. Then i break into a great singing Nina Simone's, Feeling Good. In another dimensional reality, maybe. Because in this one I climb back into bed, pull the covers over my head and whisper, I'm not ready, not ready, not ready, hoping it will be like magic dust and I'll fall into a deep, much needed rem slip.
The morning doesn't care. The Earth keeps spinning. The sun keeps trying to rise over a cloudy, overcast Nashville. I pep talk myself. New day, New dawn, New life. Advent. Get up! Pray. Yoga. Write.
But my body says - No, no, no not ready.
Plenty of stories about that. The brides that had no oil for their lamps. That old fig tree that didn't do much wrong. Just wasn't fig season. But the message isn't about figs, or lamps, or a wedding. It's about being ready - in season and out. About being filled with the kind of expectation that grows stronger everyday by faith instead of dimming in the face of pain or grief. Trial or obstacle.
There are a lot of things that lead us to step into the shadows of doubt instead of living what we know to be true. What we know deep, down in the root of our gut. About ourselves, about life, about God. In this Advent season ready or not, sleepy or not, it's time to push the covers back, and wake up and embrace this season. Not grudgingly (not ready for the cold, not ready for the day, not ready for a new life) but with an expectant heart of joy as we keep our eyes on a light that shines bright in the midst of a dark, dark, world.
I pray that beyond all doubt and darkness you may be able to find true joy and peace in your life this day.